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There’s No “I” in Blog

April 9, 2009

Bad Dates vs. No Dates

April 9, 2009

Important Health Advice

April 9, 2009

This hit the gmail forward circuit late yesterday afternoon. Like most things — it’s funny because it’s true.
Back to real posts tomorrow.

IMPORTANT HEALTH ADVICE FOR WOMEN

Do you have feelings of inadequacy?
Do you suffer from shyness?
Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor or pharmacist about Margaritas.

Margaritas are the safe, natural way to feel better and more confident about yourself and your actions.

Margaritas can help ease you out of your shyness and let you tell the world that you’re ready and willing to do just about anything.

You will notice the benefits of Margaritas almost immediately and with a regimen of regular doses you can overcome any obstacles that prevent you from living the life you want to live.

Shyness and awkwardness will be a thing of the past and you will discover many talents you never knew you had. Stop hiding and start living, with Margaritas.

Margaritas may not be right for everyone. Women who are pregnant or nursing should not use Margaritas. However, women who wouldn’t mind nursing or becoming pregnant are
encouraged to try it.

Side effects may include:
– Dizziness, nausea, vomiting, incarceration
– Erotic lustfulness
– Loss of motor control
– Loss of clothing
– Loss of money
– Loss of virginity
– Attraction to the same sex
– Table dancing
– Headache
– Dehydration
– Dry mouth
– And a desire to sing Karaoke

WARNING:
The consumption of Margaritas may make you think you are whispering when you are not.

WARNING:
The consumption of Margaritas may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.

WARNING:
The consumption of Margaritas may cause you to think you can sing.

WARNING:
The consumption of Margaritas may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.

5 comments

  1. “WARNING:
    The consumption of Margaritas may make you think you are whispering when you are not.”

    Hehe. For those of us with volume modulation issues — this is always a problem. Margarita or not.

  2. Margaritas may not be right for everyone. Women who are pregnant or nursing should not use Margaritas. However, women who wouldn’t mind nursing or becoming pregnant are
    encouraged to try it.

    Hahahaha! Loved it. Luckily, I’ve banned my friends from sending me chain letters. So that means I sometimes miss out on the good ones.

    By the way, “Post a Comment” blended in with Lala’s comment. It just took me about 5 minutes to find the link. I was absolutely PISSED. lmao! Oh yeah, and it was weire reading MY name the other day… but I secretly liked being recognized. lol

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