I watched Love Actually with my family over the holiday break. I’m sure you did too. It’s reached official holiday status.
I enjoy Love Actually for the same reasons most people do. It gives you hope in the possibility of unbelievable love stories, and it features Hugh Grant.
But every time I watch it I get caught up on one scene that, hard as a try to appreciate it, leaves me annoyed and confused and from then on completely unable to enjoy the Hugh Grant scenes (and Colin Firth – he’s very good too).
It’s that scene where the best friend (in my head his name is Good Looking) of the recently married Keira Knightly (what the fuck is that wedding dress?!) and Chiwetel Ejiofor (I think his character name is Peter) goes to the house of WTF and Maybe Peter with the many pieces of poster that read something along the lines of, “I want to tell you I think you’re perfect and actually love you because it’s Christmas. Also, don’t tell Peter.” That last part is implied by the “pretend I’m carolers” cover.
All anyone can remember about that scene is when he/the cards say, “to me, you are PERFECT.” When I try to discuss it (complain about it) to/with people they say something like, “what’s the problem? He just tells her that to him she is perfect. Don’t be such an asshole.”
I think there’s far more to it. Like the back story.
Keira thinks Good Looking really hates her because she’s stealing his best friend away, but in a painfully ironic twist he actually loves her, which we discover through the wedding video he takes starring her face, neck, and body. She sees the video, he’s sort of busted, and it’s awkward. Five or so scenes later he decides the life-sized note cards route will make it all better.
I’ve thought about what I would do in that same scenario more than a few times. She sees the video, it’s entirely focused on her, she has a feeling he loves her, she’s right.
Cowardly as this may be, I’ve decided I would lie my way out of it. I would say, “Oh you looked so beautiful that day, and I just knew Peter would want to see all these beautiful shots of you, so I took that video thinking I would give it to him so he could remember how beautiful you looked on that day.” Done.
She’s would be touched, grateful, convinced. He would be sort of lying but most of that’s the truth and this way he isn’t left wanting to kill himself because his best friend’s new wife now knows he loves her. Nobody gets hurt except Good Looking who’s not doing so great as is so we net out even.
Instead he goes for the purge it out than walk away with a triumphant-though-still-defeated, “Enough now. Enough.”
It’s powerful. You watch it and think to yourself, Ohhhh man…but hey…good for him. He needed to do that.”
I watch it and think to myself, “Don’t DO IT! You will not feel better. SHE will not feel better. If Peter finds out ALL of you will feel a lot worse. And also, where did you get all that poster board!?”
My friend Matt isn’t opposed to the moment, but he did recently admit wondering if Good Looking had an entirely different set of words on the opposite side of those posters just in case Peter came down. Like: “Hello. Please don’t tell Peter, but I got him an excellent and very expensive surprise that he will love. Yes, I could have emailed this to you, but I’m afraid he checks your email. I could have called, true, but there’s always the chance he could pick up your phone. So I decided this was my only option. Bring him to my house at 8pm so I can give him this most exciting surprise. Thank you. No, I don’t want to come in.”
Something like that.
But since this is a movie, Good Looking went plan A.
He confesses. She seems almost relieved. He seems definitely relieved. And the whole thing is rendered a distant memory. “Remember when I came to your doorstep and performed a cue card-based confession of my love in light of the holiday season?” he’ll absolutely never say.
And so, I’m left with two questions. Does this happen? And is this the right move?
I’ve confessed things and felt better. I’ve confessed things and felt much worse. But I’ve never confessed anything full-well-knowing that nothing I said would make any difference. That takes something I’m not sure I fully understand. Apparently it’s called Christmas.
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I always thought that was incredibly selfish of him. Sure, confessing probably made him feel better, but at the expense of maybe making her and his best friend feel worse. Suck it up, dude. Laugh off the video and let her go.
Besides, I don’t care how many smiles she gives him, they will be nothing but awkward together for the rest of their lives. Way to kill the friendship, dude.
It seems quite obvious to me. He did it to clear the air.
Because she had seen the video and his reaction to her seeing the video (getting extremely uncomfortable and running away) he couldn’t just pretend nothing had happened.
So he came clean, told her what she had already guessed (that he was in love with her), but also that he knew nothing could come of it (“without hope or agenda”) and that he was determined to move on (“… by next year I’ll be going out with one of these girls”).
I don’t see what’s selfish about that. Surely it will make any future encounters much less awkward than if it hadn’t taken place!? And as we see at the end it they did manage to all remain friends.
It’s true that all of it could have been achieved just as well and somewhat safer through a phone call, but that wouldn’t have been very cinematic.
To me it’s pretty similar to confessing that you cheated on someone. You don’t do it to make them feel better, you do it to make yourself feel better.
In this scenario the possible results include:
A. they have an affair
B. she feels hardcore awkward forever and convinces her husband to ditch the friend
C. husband finds out and commits double homocide
D. some variation of the above
Can we address the fact that she runs after him and gives him a kiss on the lips? Yes, I’m two-years-old and therefore need to specify type of kiss.
Does that make sense to anyone?
Disclaimer: I do love the move and also Hugh Grant.
I’ve always found that the idea of “clearing the air” works in books and movies, but doesn’t really exist in real life. People’s feelings don’t disappear with spray of Febreeze. They linger, for a long while, and you whether you address them or not, its gonna be awkward. All his little show really accomplished was to tell her he wasn’t gonna go any farther with it, and that would have been obvious after, you know, he didn’t go any farther with it.
Also, after the two-years-old-kiss, he mutters to himself something along the lines of, “Enough. Now, it’s enough.” Or something equally as dramatic and irritating. At least, I always found it irritating because well, I don’t know. What is enough? Obviously telling her is enough, but I don’t know.
I do, actually, love the movie though (woah, no pun intended), and will have to agree that it’s reached holiday-movie-status.
Love this post, Jess! And obsessed with the movie. 🙂