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In defense of Mr. Anonymous #2 or Does calling someone out make any difference?

February 16, 2009

Field Notes: It’s actually hard to set someone up

February 16, 2009

Movie Reviewed: He’s just not that into you because he’s hiding himself from himself

February 16, 2009

I saw it. I enjoyed it. At some points I laughed. At some points I cringed, but I can’t deny the fact that it represented a lot of what really happens out there; good, bad, and vom-worthy.

Yes – the movie centered on “the rules” but then ended with most characters ending up the exception. A. Hollywood does that, and B. it is true that some times thing work out and fairytales are real and all the signs you thought were wrong were right.

My gripe – or really question – is about the reality of what happens with the Justin Long and Ginnifer Goodwynne (sp?) characters (Alex and Gigi respectively). I’m calling bullshit on that storyline. In fact, most of my life is organized around calling bullshit on the idea of that storyline. So if I’m wrong and that’s right then we’ve got a real problem on our hands.

SPOILER ALERT:
Alex is the one who explains the “he’s just not that into you rule” to Gigi – a generally helpless and sort of pathetic character that we’ve all been once or always. Alex sets Gigi straight on how you know a guy is into you and how you know he isn’t. He then proceeds to treat her like he’s sort of into her — pays attention to her, takes her calls even when he’s busy with another girl, tries to help her find a great guy, etc. Now, in my (very) experienced opinion, those are not strong enough signs to, say, throw yourself on someone, but Gigi thinks they are so she outs her perceived conclusion: “You’re into me! I know it! All the signs are there!” (note: don’t do this.) 

He’s not, she’s wrong, he’s uncomfortable, she’s devastated, it’s very awkward – non-relationship over.

BUT THEN…

24-36 hours later Alex can’t stop thinking about her! He wants to call her. He wants her to call him. He’s making weird mistakes at work because he’s just that distracted. Seems he was wrong about his own previous feelings!  But now that she’s walked away he’s awakened! 36 hours prior he had so little interest in her that he didn’t even want to touch her, but the truth is that his emotions were just too closed off to accept deeply embedded feelings of into-her-ness. But now that she’s presented herself as an option he realizes how much he wants her!

This all reminds me of that time the woman fell through the subway grate on some street in Manhattan frightening close to my apartment. See I (like all of us) was functioning under the very important belief that this doesn’t happen — can’t happen. The metal is stable, the streets are inspected and only a hypochondriac or girl in spiky heels walks around the grates. Then this woman falls straight through and my entire world is fucked.

So now I need to know if guys who show ample signs they like you but don’t make a move or refuse your moves sometimes simply don’t realize that they actually love you.  But they do possess the potential for awakening to this deeply embedded fact the moment you walk away.    

‘Cause if that’s probable, or even possible, then I think I’ll go back to walking right over all the grates I come across with the hopes I too fall in. 

4 comments

  1. I saw this movie and thought the same thing. Throughout the movie, there were a lot of “breath in a Carrie Bradshaw” eeek type way. What’s even sadder is – I am Gigi. I have been waiting for a guy to call me back for a week now and I check my phone, I bring it with me everywhere and even if I abandon it shortly – I immediately return to it, hoping for a missed call. Bleh. But you’re 100% right – shit like that don’t happy! Crazy girls remain single and crazy!

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