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November 2, 2009

The dating issues of New Yorkers: it’s an issue of choice

November 2, 2009

The Top 10 Dating Issues of today’s New Yorkers

November 2, 2009

I’d been planning a series on the cornerstone problems/hang ups/issues of modern dating, but then New York Magazine got to it first, so I’ll just go off theirs.

Their piece was born out of the Sex Diaries that have become a staple of the nymag.com Daily Intel site. Each week a different, anonymous New Yorker shares a full week of exploits, thoughts, and often much, much more assigning time-stamps and explanation to every sexually-related issue that presents. They. Are. Fascinating. But even more important – as we learn from this piece – They. Are. Telling.

The author read every single Sex Diary published since the columns inception in April of ’07. That’s 141 entries equaling over 800 pages of clues into the minds of sexually active Gothamites.

After 800 pages, the patterns emerged. We’ve got some issues – categorizable ones – that speak to things like dating in a technological era, dating in a mega-city, and dating as career people. Fascinating stuff.

Sprinkled throughout the next posts I’ll explore the issues New York mag identified (note: they call them “anxieties”) – my thoughts on what goes on as they relate to the 20-something set (the article covers every age-range) including what they mean and how they can change.

As a preview it’s:

  1. The anxiety of too much choice
  2. The anxiety of making the wrong choice
  3. The anxiety of not being chosen
  4. The anxiety of appearing overly enthusiastic
  5. The anxiety of appearing delusional
  6. The anxiety of appearing overly sincere
  7. The anxiety of appearing prudish
  8. Internet-enabled agoraphobia
  9. Separation anxiety
  10. The anxiety of being unable to love

Stay-tuned for Wednesday’s first deep-dive, and in the meantime, read as many Sex Diaries as possible. It’s one guarenteed way to feel really good or really bad about your dating life…

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