This time the back story is short but not particularly sweet:

I heard a story through the grapevine about a guy who, upon finding out that his girlfriend cheated on him, essentially shrugged it off. I know very few details, so I’ll leave it at that.

In reaction to hearing this story I said something like, “OMG That Is Ridiculous Why Would He Let Her Walk All Over Him Like That Has He No Decency?! No Self Worth?!”

To which one or two or more people in my general vicinity responded with something along the lines of, “yeah, but she’s really hot, and he probably figures he’s never going to do better than her.”

(Fine, the people were men.)

Is this a thing?! Like an understood thing that bros have known bros to do? And if so, how many? If you are a man and you are reading this, how many friends do you have who have stayed in a relationship with a cheating girl because she’s hot? I want numbers.

Because I can’t believe this is actually something men choose when given the option between cheating girlfriend and less attractive girlfriend. And if some men choose it then does that mean some women do too? Do some women know their boyfriends cheat but stay with them simply because they’re hot?

I realize people stay with cheaters because they’re too insecure to be alone, because they think they are somehow to blame for the cheating or because they believe the cheater will reform, but is there really, truly a 4th category for the, “but he/she’s just so hot,” rationale?

And then if this is all true, do these cheatees cheat right back in a sort of unspoken open relationship? Do they only stay in these relationship until their friends call them out? Or is there an understanding/respect/get out of jail free card for dudes who stay with their hot, cheating girlfriends – a, “listen it sucks, but I get it bro” code. I can’t say the same applies among my girlfriends, but perhaps the code exists for girls as well.

I am befuddled and confused. I feel like I felt that time I learned that some people lie about bad experiences at places like hotels and restaurants just to get refunds or additional deals. People do that, I thought, and get away with it??

Please assist in correcting my naivete by sharing your stories of first, second or third person knowledge of these “arrangements” in comments.

Thank you.